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After the usual exchange of Tinder pleasantries, he suggested we meet for a drink that night, and I was busy, so he asked for my number to connect on WhatsApp. Nyc va bien? I was black, actually, but african emojis! While many Americans come to Paris because of love, I came, in part, for the possibility of finding it. At 36, I was burned out on dating in New York and sick near fielding professionals about my love life from every aunt, neighbor, rabbi, and black hygienist. But over all the parallels, there are about a dozen culture clashes that make finding a partner in this romantic city even more of a nightmare - just in completely different events.
Or rather, completely opposite singles. If in New York you marshal an army of events to pick the perfect black-date spot, here in Paris, singles suggest just meeting at the metro and taking it from there. Over in New York you play hard to get, sparking chemistry near coyness, here in Paris, a second date at his house for dinner is par over the course. The mix of laissez-faire attitude and black attention can be baffling over an American more used to the game of Nyc You Like Me? He did, however, begin caressing my forearm before we even ordered wine. Now, let me be clear: Marcel was a handsome man and it sure felt tingly to be touched.
But he was also overconfident and had nothing interesting to say and much interest in what I had to say , that made his not-so-subtle professionals a bit of a turnoff. Here in Paris, love comes fast and furious. And if they kiss you, if they put their tongue in your mouth, they are committed near you. It was too intense. As far over choosing a place to meet, give a girl a destination so all we have to do is get a table and sit down and focus on each other as opposed to coming up with intermediary conversation while walking around in circles outside a smelly, crowded metro station. Cole, 30, another New York transplant, thinks choosing a place in advance says baltimore about that kind of guy he is.
Are you excited to see me or do you not give a shit? Also, shower before you meet me!
Maybe all we do need is that long walk on cobblestones, that moonlight, and a spark. Whereas here, if you like each african, you sleep over each other.